Losing an American Treasure...and Great Family Man

This past week has been busy, crazy, sad, and so many other emotions I can't list or describe. Marie's husband, Bill, who live upstairs passed away at home Tuesday morning and everything since then has been a blur. He came home from the hospital Monday evening and it was obvious he was not going to last much longer and by Tuesday morning he was gone. Vivi and I went upstairs first thing in the morning and I explained to her that Grandpa Bill was sleeping, wasn't going to wake up, and went to live with Jesus and Heavenly Father. She looked at me with big, wide eyes and then smiled and said 'Ok.' I know she's too young to understand, but I wanted to take this opportunity to teach her. And it was all up to me because Doug was gone Mon-Thurs on a work trip, which was a huge challenge by itself!

The day of the memorial service(s) was a marathon day, but I learned a lot of things. The most important is that life is made of the stories we create, remember and pass on. Bill had a million stories and it was obvious that his children, grandchildren, and friends loved and remembered his stories about growing up, about war, about being a tugboat and ferry captain, and about his family and friends.

The second major thing is that our country is losing American treasures like Bill, which was pierced my heart more personally than it ever had before at his grave when I saw his brothers in the Navy honor his life and death with a 21-gun salute, presentation of the flag and taps. Bill was an amazing man who fought in World War II, Korea and Vietnam. He was a part of history. He came from a poor farming family in Missouri (born 1927) and worked his way up to retire as a Navy Captain! The things he saw and experienced are humbling to think about.

The third thing I didn't realize was how much Bill loved and was devoted to children, especially his grandchildren. By the time I got to know Bill, he had a lot of trouble getting around, was difficult to understand sometimes, and was (I thought) relatively scary to little kids (as older adults can be), at least to Vivi sometimes. But as I heard the stories his grown grandchildren shared and the obvious love and adoration they had for him and I was forced to think of a different Bill, a younger and more physically-able Bill.who equally adored these children.

The earlier part of the week was filled with stress, love, service, car trips, food, memories, and family. Marie and family planned the service for this weekend, which meant there was a lot of organizing and planning to do in just a few days. It turned out wonderfully, but it was certainly stressful for those involved (I wasn't really involved, but helped when I could). There was an amazing tribute to the Bill on one last ferry boat ride (complete with a stop half way through the route, family dropping flowers, honking the horn, and a final goodbye from the captain to Captain Ray when the hearse got off boat), a grave site dedication complete with full military honors, and love-filled memorial service later in the day. All for an amazing patriot and an even more generous and caring family man.

Captain Ray will be missed, but he fought a hard fight, most recently against his own body. In the previous month, this proud man felt his body and mind rebel against him. It made me wonder why the Lord suffers some people to leave the world in this manner. While I don't have a complete answer, I believe that part of the reason is to provide an opportunity for others to express Christ-like love through service. The outpouring of support, meals, desserts, prayers, offer of time, offer of services, etc. was incredible. While some of these actions may seem cliche or minor, but I was touched by everyone's concern and willingness to help a family who was mourning a great loss.